Joe remembers returning to the corral after a fun family ride. He was thrown from his horse and woke up in an ambulance. A former probation officer, who took pride in his education and his job, he can no longer work. He is deeply frustrated. “Sometimes when I’m home alone and the depression and loneliness and probably self pity overwhelm me, I begin to cry,” he says. “I don’t want to feel the tears rolling down my face, so I will lean over and bow my head so they fall straight down. I search the puddle on the floor looking for the pain the tears are supposed to wash away, but all I see is a puddle of tears.”